Wexistence

Wexistential Crises, Wayward Thoughts, Welcome Distractions and Willful Pursuits

A Collection of Stupid Conversations with Siblings

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At some point in the dinner conversation, I said “leche” and “lechugas.” My kid sister looked at me reproachfully.
Cookie: Ate, aren’t those curse words?
Me: No, “leche” means milk and “lechugas” means lettuce.
Luigi: I thought “churvaloo” was a kind of breakfast cereal.

Fer: It perplexes me.
Luigi: WTF. I’m not used to you sounding smart. You’re not allowed to use words with more than one syllable.
Fer: Like “exacerbate?” I like that word.
Me: You only like it because it sounds like “masturbate.”
Fer: I’m not like that! I don’t laugh when someone says “butt.”

Fer: My friend’s brother has a Subaru Impreza. It’s got a carbon fiber hood!
Me: What’s so great about a carbon fiber hood?
Luigi: It can’t be detected on dradis!

At Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf in Alabang Town Center
Me: Dude, that guy so looks like Bill Adama. Bill Adama is ordering coffee!
Fer: No, he’s ordering the launch of the alert Vipers. That’s Mr. Gaeta at the counter.
Me: Set condition two throughout the ship!
Fer: Prepare for an FTL jump to emergency coordinates!
Girl sitting next to us:

While watching Return of the Jedi, during that scene where the Super Star Destroyer crashes into the Death Star
Manol: Dude, that’s stupid. Why didn’t the Super Star Destroyer just float out into space?
Luigi: Because it was drawn in by the gravity of the Death Star.
Manol (confused):
Luigi: Everything that has mass has gravity.
Manol (appalled): No!

We were on our way to a family Christmas lunch and as we rolled down the car windows to smoke we were blasted by the chilly December air.
Manol: Dude, it’s so cold.
Me: That’s because the Earth is at the farthest point from the sun.
Manol (indignant): Of course not! Pluto is the farthest from the sun!
Luigi: She meant the farthest in our orbit!
Manol (baffled): But Earth is the only planet in our orbit!

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